Difference between revisions of "Gabe"

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== Soundbites from the Gabe variety hour ==
== Soundbites from the Gabe variety hour ==
*I'll vaccinate you in the fuckin` head!
*I'll vaccinate you in your fuckin` head!
[[File:Vaccinate you in the head.mp3]]
[[File:Vaccinate you in the head.mp3]]

Revision as of 14:01, 11 February 2022

Gabe is an idiot a cooker who lives in Port Melbourne, Australia.

Dr Eggman. The father of Gabe

About Gabriel

Scientists are unsure whether Gabe is a human toe, an egg, or some kind of accursed, advanced genetic hybrid between the two.

Observers have also noted, that he may actually be a thumb, with a face drawn on.

Gabe claims the growth on his lip is plastic surgery from getting glassed in a bar fight, but it is most likely a small egg getting ready to hatch.

Habitat

He can generally be found in his bedroom, livestreaming on Instagram, while obsessing over the Twitch chats of AsSeenOnTelegram and DiscoDeadPigeon, much to the detriment of his guests, his attention rapidly drifting away from them, to fully fixate on his new addiction, leftist Twitch chat. Gabe was gifted subs to both of these channels.

Diet

Gabe's diet consists of tuna, rice and cigarettes.

Beliefs

Gabe maintains a stern policy of "All talk, no action", as he has yet to visit Canberra, but assures us all, he'll definitely Hood Oos "The Cossack" if he does. He is currently on the verge of de-cooking.

Personal Life

Gabe currently appears to be listless and directionless in life, perhaps due to his recent involvement in a one-sided parasocial relationship, as he yearns for and obsesses over a popular Twitch streamer known for her egg-baiting antics.

Soundbites from the Gabe variety hour

  • I'll vaccinate you in your fuckin` head!