Difference between revisions of "Zeus"
(added some real details of the truck to go with the jokes) |
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| Used By = Cookers | | Used By = Cookers | ||
| Wars = [[Canberra Siege]] | | Wars = [[Canberra Siege]] | ||
| Mass = | | Mass = 6540kg Tare weight | ||
16 tonnes GVM | |||
| length = | |||
30 tonnes of Ego | |||
| length = 6m | |||
| width = 2.2m (approx) | | width = 2.2m (approx) | ||
| Crew = 5 cookers (Internal) | | Crew = 5 cookers (Internal) | ||
20 cookers (hanging on for dear life) | 20 cookers (hanging on for dear life) | ||
| Armor = | | Armor = Matte black paint | ||
| Main Armament = Empty Emu Export Cans | | Main Armament = Empty Emu Export Cans | ||
| Line 19: | Line 21: | ||
Body odour | Body odour | ||
A spicy cough | |||
Cringe | Cringe | ||
| Engine = Fully-sick | |||
Any cookers who fall off | |||
| Engine = Fully-sick straight-6 bruz | |||
| Power/Weight = | | Power/Weight = | ||
| Transmission = clapped out | | Transmission = clapped out | ||
| Suspension = Raised beyond logic | | Suspension = Raised beyond logic | ||
| Ground clearance = 3 cooker kids high | | Ground clearance = 3 cooker kids high | ||
| Fuel capacity = | | Fuel capacity = 300 litres | ||
| Operational range = 150m before breaking down | | Operational range = 150m before breaking down | ||
| Maximum speed = | | Maximum speed = 250km/h (down a hill) | ||
}} | }} | ||
The ''B1 Zeus'' Main battle wank (a.k.a. Impound Force 1) is a first generation Cooker battle vehicle designed by cookers and | The ''B1 Zeus'' Main battle wank (a.k.a. Impound Force 1) is a first generation Cooker battle vehicle designed by cookers and built off a 1998 Freightliner FL80. It was heavily modified into a cookercab pickup (because a regular ute just isn't big enough to compensate for the owners.. shortcomings), with a lift-kit and the load tub off a Ford F350/450 dually pickup truck, painted matte black with large air horns and plastered with Tactical flags and cooker slogans in fluoro colours. | ||
It was developed as a prototype for the soon to be created | It was developed as a prototype for the soon to be created micro-nation of Cooktopia as their primary method of combating the fascist pedophile mason satanic cabal and replacing it with their own fascist pedophile mason satanic cabal. | ||
[[file:Zeus-side-1.png|600px]] | [[file:Zeus-side-1.png|600px]] | ||
<br/>'''Image''': | <br/>'''Image''': Built off a 1998 Freightliner FL80 (likely originally a fire truck), Zeus employs a number of standard field-approved modifications, such as twin "Look at me, I'm an idiot and I'm about to do something stupid" train horns, twin-overhead grease nipples, chrome plated foxtail on the antenna, a dash mounted flower vase and an up-cycled F-truck tub from a local buy-nothing group. | ||
<br> | <br> | ||
<br> | <br> | ||
[[file:Zeus-refuelling-drogue.png|600px]] | [[file:Zeus-refuelling-drogue.png|600px]] | ||
<br/>'''Image''': recently declassified imagery of the in-flight refueling system drogue in action | <br/>'''Image''': recently declassified imagery of the in-flight refueling system drogue in action. | ||
<br/> | |||
<br/> | |||
[[file:Firetruck.jpg|600px]] | |||
<br/>'''Image''': what this vehicle looked like before the cookers ruined it. | |||
Revision as of 10:04, 13 February 2022
The B1 Zeus Main battle wank (a.k.a. Impound Force 1) is a first generation Cooker battle vehicle designed by cookers and built off a 1998 Freightliner FL80. It was heavily modified into a cookercab pickup (because a regular ute just isn't big enough to compensate for the owners.. shortcomings), with a lift-kit and the load tub off a Ford F350/450 dually pickup truck, painted matte black with large air horns and plastered with Tactical flags and cooker slogans in fluoro colours.
It was developed as a prototype for the soon to be created micro-nation of Cooktopia as their primary method of combating the fascist pedophile mason satanic cabal and replacing it with their own fascist pedophile mason satanic cabal.
Image: Built off a 1998 Freightliner FL80 (likely originally a fire truck), Zeus employs a number of standard field-approved modifications, such as twin "Look at me, I'm an idiot and I'm about to do something stupid" train horns, twin-overhead grease nipples, chrome plated foxtail on the antenna, a dash mounted flower vase and an up-cycled F-truck tub from a local buy-nothing group.
Image: recently declassified imagery of the in-flight refueling system drogue in action.
Image: what this vehicle looked like before the cookers ruined it.